I will never be yours By Melan pamp
Hearing the door open to my room I’m too tired to open my eyes, just want to sleep for the whole day.
“Selena it’s time you wake up, Michael will be waiting for you soon!” I hear Emma say when she walks inside the room and takes a seat on the bed.
“No! I’m tired today, can’t I have a day off?” I sigh when she pulls the quilt off me.
“No! You have to get up! Breakfast will be ready in a moment and I suggest you take a shower and come down to the kitchen!” she pulls the quilt off me completely and the cold air on my warm skin gives me goosebumps.
“One day off is all I ask, I’m deathly tired,” I say with a yawn and sit up in the bed.
“Now go and take a shower! Heard anything about when he will be back?” Kian has been away for a lot more days than he thought, right now there have been five days away from him and even if we have talked on the phone, I’m still worried about him. They have found several things they are trying to get under control but that’s all he has told me. I have been focusing on training and keeping my pack inside the barrier.
Jessie is like a boiling kettle ready to boil over any second and when she does there will be hard to keep her inside, I’m afraid she might do something we all will regret. I have been taking her with me every day I have been going to Michael, it’s the best chance for me to have control of what she does most of the time.
“No, I haven’t, he will call again tonight!” I have been exhausted with the training and I haven’t had the energy to mind link with him when he has been so far away.
“Alright! Now get to the shower!” she says and gets up from the bed before she starts to pull on my arm
“I’m going!” I say and place my feet on the cold floor before getting up from the bed. I better be up and make sure everyone does what they suppose to than laying in bed even if I rather had done it.
“Good! I’ll be downstairs once you are done!” she says and starts to head towards the door, I walk over to the bathroom and do my business before turning on the shower. Tossing my shirt in the wash bin I head over to the shower and get inside, letting the warm water pour down my body before I take up the shampoo and wash my hair.
Rinsing it out I take the soap and wash my body when my hands reach to my bre@st pain instantly shoots out and I stop in my motions. Did I just feel that?
Water running down my body is the only thing I feel for a long moment before I take my hand back to touch my bre@st.
Both of them are sore and they feel a bit swollen, I hardly manage to keep a straight thought, what I have been pushing away from me for days has now caught up with me. I stand inside the shower for a long moment and try to wrap my head around this, I knew from the day they told me it will probably be true. Emma has never been wrong before, but I had to keep a distance from it before I knew for sure and now here I am with no way to push it from me any longer.
The word pregnant gets stuck in my head and I take my hand down to my stomach and place it there. I’m carrying mine and Kian’s child how many are there inside my womb? I know I have to tell him once he comes home and I instantly get nervous to tell him all I know, only hope he will take it well.
Caressing my belly it’s a strange feeling to already know I love them and will do everything I can to protect them, they are a piece of me and Kian.
Feeling a mind link reaching out to me I know it’s Kian and take a moment to get my feelings under control before picking the link up.
“What’s wrong?” he says even before I have had a chance to say anything else. I guess he has felt my emotions somehow through the bond.
“Nothing! How is it going over there?” I ask him instead and try to have my emotions under control even if hearing his voice makes my heart take one extra beat in my chest.
“I know there is something! I feel some strange feelings through the bond!” he says and I have to be better and make sure to shield my emotions until he comes back from the council, then we will have a long talk.
“I just miss you terribly!” I say through the mind link and turn off the shower, my sop from my body has been washed off a long time ago.
“Are you sure that’s all?” he says and I take a towel and wrap it around me when I have got out of the shower.
“Yes that’s all, have to go to Michael soon! When are you coming back?” I say and have to end it soon before my energy gets drained.
“I’m not sure yet! I will call you later!” he says and I head out to my room.
“Alright! Talk to you later!” I say and cut the link. It’s better to talk on the phone later. Walking inside my closet I take down some clothes from the shelf and put them on, sipping up my pants I wonder how long I’m going to be able and wear my clothes before I have to buy new ones with room for a growing belly.
Getting out of my closet I stop in my track when a thought hit me, the number of things we will have to buy for the children. I’m going to be a mother and how many children are there?
Taking my hand and reaching for the bedpost I hold on to it before I have to take a seat on the bed, placing my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands I have. to take a moment. Everything just hit me at once!
Making sure my walls are up tight so Kian can’t feel anything through the bond when I hear the door to my bedroom being opened and even before she says anything I know it’s Emma. She is silent when she comes over and takes a seat beside me on the bed, she places her arm around my shoulders.
“I can tell you I felt the same way once I found out I was pregnant with Ella! I was terrified and wondered if I ever was going to make it as a mother and at the same time I already loved her!” she says and I keep my head in my hands and take a deep breath.
“I just hope he will take it well once I tell him!” I say what my biggest fear right now .is.