The Beast And The Blessed by Ashley Breanne
Chapter 25
Natalie’s P.O.V.
Killian was shocked that night when he got back to the room and found me curled up in the armchair by the balcony. His eyebrows were raised as he examined the throw blanket I had wrapped around me and the pillow I had taken from the bed.
“Natalie,” He started after I stared at him in silence for several minutes, waiting for him to crack and speak first. I didn’t need to be the king to know that was the first rule in negotiation, not to speak first. “We need to talk.”
My hands clasped together on my lap, and I stared blankly at him. All my anger from earlier had melted away, and while I wanted to still yell at him, it almost felt like I had no ground to stand on anymore. I was nothing to him. Yelling and venting my feelings would do nothing if the recipient had no interest in them.
His hands tightened into fists when he realized that I would not respond, but I watch with curiosity as he let out a deep breath and relaxed once more. “Only those that need to know about my mother do. You will need to keep what you saw today to yourself.”
My lips pursed out as I dropped my gaze in frustration and nodded as it dawned on me. I was not in the need to know. Whether I was to mate with him, ** for him, or rule by his side, I was not one of the people that he trusted to know about his family. If I were to be his mate and queen, he would have told me about it. I would have needed to know. But he didn’t because I was nothing to him.
“Is that an order or a request, Your Majesty?” I said, letting my frustration sink into my words and my bitterness into his title. In the privacy of our bedroom or in public, I would no longer call him by his name. Not until he had earned it and proved that he was more than my king and I was more than his underling.
Killian almost flinched as I avoided his name, and I watched as his shoulders fell a fraction of an inch. If I had blinked, I would have missed it.
“It is a requirement of your position to keep cla*s*sified information to yourself.” His avoidance of my question answered me. It was an order.
“Yes, Your Majesty,” I said before glancing at the balcony doors and staring out at the bright city below. Their world lit up the night and took my breath away from the beauty. I had to wonder what it would have been like to have made it to the human city. What would I be doing right now if I were a part of the people and not being stuffed and prepared like a *on its way to the oven?
Of course, the apple in the * *was not as glamorous as the silver and diamond pendant they placed around my neck, but the outcome would be the same.
I would be served up to my captures and my remains would be discarded of when they were done with me. My lips twitched as I acknowledged my own dramatics, and I tensed when Killian moved up to stand next to me. His gaze was not on the city. I could feel his eyes burning a *into my head as I refused to look up at him.
“You used to call me Killian.” His statement made me scoff as I curled my lip. His name. I was very aware. I had moaned it hundreds of times last night, just before he shattered what was left of me.
“That was when I thought you were more than just a king,” I said, the words slipping past my lips, and I heard him take in a sharp breath, making me instantly regret opening my mouth. The memory of him. ripping out my packmate’s heart in front of me had me shaking as he stood unmoving next to me. “I shouldn’t have said that. My apologies, Your Majesty.”
He seemed to pick up on the tremor in my voice but didn’t acknowledge it beyond taking a small step away from me. “You are scared of me.”
“Is that not what you prefer? For your people to be scared of you?” The greater distance between us meant nothing. He could still just as easily rip my throat out before I could take my next breath, but he didn’t.
“No. My people do not fear me. They respect me. It is the others who fear me, the ones who live outside, of my walls. They remain under my rule, but know nothing of loyalty or the lengths my people go to for them.” He sounded so sure, that I wanted to shrink away until I was absorbed by the cushion behind me and disappeared.
I didn’t know what to say, needing to discuss last night, but not wanting to start the fight that I knew could either end my life or end my life as I knew it.
“Was I too rough with you last night? Did I hurt you?” His question took me by surprise, and I turned my head to look up at him only to find he had looked away from me and was now staring out at his people. His eyebrows were pinched together, and his hand was flexing at his side.
“No,” I whispered, feeling my body still and my fear melt away. It was the pained look on his face as he considered having hurt me that told me that he never would. What he did to my hips had been welcomed and the rawness between my legs today was delicious. “You hurt me the next morning when you treated me like I was a common w*ho*re that you had paid for with clothing and jewelry.”
“I know I have been distant but I am doing my best. I have given you everything that you could possibly want to be happy here.”
A laugh left me at his words, and I glared at him. “What makes you think you know what would make me happy? You know nothing about me! This is the most you have ever even spoken to me.”
Killian moved forward as he turned to face me, pressing his back against the wall next to the double doors that led to the balcony. “So, tell me.”
“Excuse me?” I blinked at him several times in shock as he waited for me to respond. It was the look on his face that had me the most surprised. I had only seen it a few times. He rarely let his guard down and acted as a man instead of the king.
Yet, as he kept his intense gaze on me, I was stunned into silence. Did he want to get to know me now?
“What would make you happy? I can give you anything in the world. What would you like?” His hand gestured behind him toward the city, and I glanced past him and toward the town of people.
I pictured all of the people below us. The families tucking their children in for bed. The couples cuddled up, stealing kisses and discussing their day.
“Civility,” I stated plainly, and I watched as his eyebrows pulled together as he contemplated my answer before I added to it. “Consistency.”
He didn’t seem to know what to do with my request, and I let out a sigh as I adjusted the blanket around my body before elaborating. “Since you brought me here you have been hot and cold with me. You treat me like I am this prized possession that you are scared to break at night but as soon as the sun comes up, you are cold and ***.”
“***? I have never been ***to you!” He argued as he pushed off the wall and stood staring at me with incredulity.
“You may not have been violent with me, but that does not mean that your actions haven’t been ***.” I pushed the blanket onto the floor, as I stood with him, not liking that he was glaring down at me. While I was significantly shorter than him, minimizing the space between us made me feel more confident.
He pinched the bridge of his nose as he closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. “You wish for me to be consistent but not cold or ***.”
I bit the inside of my cheek as I watched him calm himself. “If I am going to have to * for you, the least you can do is treat me like I’m not some great burden that you are stuck with. You don’t have to love me, but you can at least be civil toward me.”
Killian’s eyes widened as they melted into the burning red of his beast, and I stepped back an inch until my legs hit the chair behind me. “Why the *** would you *** for me?”